Remember, kids. When all hope is lost, when the last light fades, when things look their worst… throw all your ambitious into a garbage can and roll over in defeat. It’s just the sensible thing to do.

If there’s one theme I see repeated among my contemporaries, it’s that of staying up to some godawful hour and slamming together a comic strip at the last minute. Not I, dear friends! Nay, I slam together these slap-dash strips at a fairly reasonable hour weeks ahead of time. For I am a responsible, professional, and all-together has-it-together sort of cartoonist.

…These little text bits, though, invariably get written about an hour before the strip goes live. Typically sometime as I’m crawling into bed, desperately trying to figure out why I’ve got this nagging feeling that I’m missing oh shit I didn’t write the news post shit shit shit. Much like what just happened mere moments before I started slapping these keys. So if you’ve ever wondered about the wildly varying quality of these things, well, there ya go.