How can they be under pressure if they’re in a vacuum? Boom! I’m the best at comedy forever! No, please, don’t make any more jokes, jokes are done. It’s a downhill slope, because I have created peak comedy. If comedy is “X,” then baby, I have solved for it. The microphone I just dropped put a 20-foot-deep crater into the ground, and the laughter I created shattered mountains. Throw your joke books into a garbage can and burn them, because I have this shit on lock down.

Also, in the first panel, I’ve demonstrated a fun new trick for making yourself slimmer. Just hide your unsightly gut behind speech balloons! Guaranteed to totally obscure your body type, confusing friends and enemies alike! And, uh, readers. But hey, omelettes, eggs, you know.